Happy 2013!

It's 2013. I haven't made a blog post in over 6 months. My last post was about preschool graduation for C. So much has changed and been going on since then. Not sure why I gave up updating. I should do a better job. I'm never going to remember all the stuff that has happened since then. Well, once again, I will try to start the year off right and do some regular updates so I can keep track of stuff.

Conner is a few weeks from being 5 1/2 years. Brennan is a few days from being 22 months. Crazy how fast time has flown by. Conner is repeating Pre-K at a new school and is really doing great. It's hard socially, making new friends all over again, but he is doing well in school and has 2 excellent teachers.

The last week and a half, Conner has been off school. I wish we could say we did something really exciting but we really haven't. Both kids have had colds the entire break. C did get to go to a few fun places, a few movies, a Children's Museum and an arcade a few times. He really does so much better in a routine and staying busy so breaks are hard on him. He still had his therapies so at least that stayed the same.

As for little Miss B, she has been doing good. She has good days and bad. She's VERY picky and has an opinion about everything. Even without so much talking, she still gets across what she wants.

In 2012, we took a trip to Mackinac Island, Grand Rapids and another road trip to Florida (to Disney). We met Laurie Berkner (used to be one of Conner's favorite singers!), raised almost $4000 for The Friendship Circle of Michigan, participated in Dance Marathon at UofM for the 2nd year and Conner even got to go tree climbing.

Conner has continued to love school and all of his therapists and works harder than any kid in his class to do every task (according to his teachers). He is (mostly) a really good kid. He loves going to the movies, still loves trains and going to Greenfield Village. He has changed a lot this year in to a big kid. He has been dealing with dysfluency (stuttering) for over 1 year now so we are pretty sure that it is not just a developmental phase but a permanent problem that he will have to learn to deal with. I will save that for another post. He loves to eat almost everything and although he went through a phase when he wanted PB and J for every meal, he doesn't really ask for it any more. He LOVES sushi. I'd say that's really his favorite food if he could pick. Conner likes to play with my iPad in waiting rooms and still loves being read to. He also loves anything Disney and Kidz Bop music. He is very creative and likes to pretend play with just about everything. He is getting in to board games and got a few new ones this year that we have been playing with. He's a pretty fun little dude!

Brennan has grown up so much this year. She loves to play with her babies and anything that Conner has. She has absolutely no interest in TV or videos at all but somehow she knows Elmo and LOVES him. She also really loves books and we read them over and over all day. She loves music and loves to dance. I can't wait to get her in to a dance class (if she wants...when she gets older of course!). Even though she can be challenging, she is also so much fun. She has such a cute smile and giggle. She is so picky about what she eats and likes snacks more than meals. We just keep trying. She likes yogurt, yogurt raisins, frozen yogurt (see the trend?!) and veggie straws. She does like pizza sometimes and turkey and cheese roll ups like Conner. Tonight, she actually willingly ate raw broccoli. It was so strange...but maybe she's growing up!

For David and me, this year has been okay. We would like to get out more just the two of us but it's hard. We are hoping that 2013 is great for all of us. Looking forward to making some changes for all of us.

Highlights from 2012 in no particular order:

Happy New Year to all our family and friends...I'm sure noone is reading us any more, but maybe it will pick up in the new year!

Preschool Graduation

Conner graduated from preschool last Friday. He went to three different preschools in 3 years (4 if you count camp) but finished up at a perfect place for him. The graduation included the kindergarten and the 2 classes of 4 year olds. Conner's class got to do 2 songs first and then at the end all the kids were on stage with their teachers to do a few more. They received certificates from one of the Rabbi's that comes to school every Friday. Conner did an awesome job on stage and although I'm not sure he was singing too much (he has a bit of stage fright!), he did do some of the hand motions. He was able to be on stage by himself with his classmates and we were really proud of him. His papa and aunt (cousin) and cousin along with me, David and B were there. Afterwards, they had some snacks in the class and then Conner stayed to play with a few friends for the rest of the day.

Lining up on stage getting ready for their graduation performance

the hand motions for the song were something about shaking their hands.

Conner standing next to his good buddy for the "ahavah" song.

Obviously SHE knows the hand motions a little better than Conner!

getting his preschool diploma and shaking the Rabbi's hand!

got the diploma...a Preschool Graduate!!

The whole preschool on stage. Behind Conner are some of the wonderful teachers that made this year such a success for him!

One of Conner's awesome teachers who helped him down the steps. Conner absolutely LOVED "Miss Erika"!

Conner's "advocate" who helped make this year such an amazing success for him. Even though she was there for him, she also helped him to become so much more independent. We are forever grateful to Miss Julie and we are so glad to have one more year with her. She has made such a huge impact in Conner's life.

Conner on the playground after school. This is such a good picture of him...I can see a smile AND his eyes all in one picture!

Conner playing Mini-Golf at the camp at the last day of school picnic. I'm so glad he will be going to camp here!

One of the most fantastic preschools around. Miss Robin was so great with Conner and taught him so much. We are so grateful that she was Conner's teacher this year and gave him such a wonderful school year.

The school that Conner attended this year was so great for him. He had two wonderful teachers and a wonderful 1 on 1 (advocate). I feel so lucky that he was able to have this experience. When the year began, I really had no idea what to expect but all my hopes were exceeded. Conner is doing so many things that he wasn't doing before. There are things that are still really hard for him, but socially and behaviorally, he did so great. He made some really nice friends and although he was only at the school for a year with them, it gave me hope for his future schooling. Conner especially loved the girls he met this year and those are the only ones he wants at his birthday party!  The full inclusion program at his school is so perfect for him. He had the opportunity to be with typical kids and gain some really important skills and was treated just like everyone else. I know none of his teachers or administrators will ever read this but to all of the individuals that helped us this year, that had any interaction with my special boy, I am forever grateful to you for your kindness, warmth and compassion. You all are such a wonderful group of people and Conner has learned so much from you.

During the last week of school, we met with the Director of the Special Needs program and also went to a parent meeting for Camp (at his school). Initially, Conner was going to the preschool camp first session and regular camp (for kindergarten) 2nd session but the more we talked about it, the more we thought it was better for him to be with his friends in the "big" camp all summer. So we made the switch and Conner will be in the kindergarten camp group. I'm excited and anxious for him to have this experience. I'm hoping he'll love it!

It was such a good year that Conner will attend the same school for kindergarten. Right now, it's a really small class. Hopefully they will get a couple more kids, but I'm hopeful that he will have just as good of an experience.

June 6, 2012

I don't know why the past few days have been so tough. Maybe it's because Conner is getting older and I'm getting a little more sensitive. Maybe I just expect more from other kids and parents. Maybe I'm just scared about the future. But we went to a place today that we have been before to play. It's a pretty new place and Conner had a good time the last time we went. Conner loves playing with other kids, but he doesn't mind playing by himself, especially if he doesn't know the other kids. Anyway, long story short, the kids were mean. They couldn't have been older than 5 and the mother was sitting right there. You know that I gave those kids the stink eye...I glared at them if they even thought about saying something to Conner. But I did hear some comments like "he can't do it, he can't run, he doesn't know his name". When we got home, I was telling David about it and Conner said, "that boy was rude". I don't know...I think I just have higher expectations for people. I thought that the world was becoming more accepting of kids with different abilities. Boy was I wrong.

BREAKTHROUGH!! - June 4, 2012

Tonight when I was reading to Conner, he started doing something that has been SO hard for him. Conner can count but when it comes to counting things he just never seemed like he knew how to do it. He would always just point and count aimlessly. Part of me wondered if he just can't concentrate long enough to make it make sense. It gets frustrating for him, for us, for teachers. Well, we were reading a book and all of a sudden Conner started pointing at things and counting. He was being silly and saying "3, 0, 1" and I said, let's do it together. He replied "I want to do it by myself" and he showed me correctly. Then we proceeded to count fingers, toes, ears, cars, etc. And then I said, "can you count by 10's?" and he just did it. This might seem small to some people, but to me, it was huge. Feels like a big breakthrough. He's getting it. It's a step.

June 3, 2012 - Teary

Today we tried to take a family walk. Conner started out so excited to put on his roller skates (the kind that go on shoes) and Brennan was riding in a little car with a push handle. We started out with Conner being upset that we couldn't locate his knee pads (it's actually been so long since he's warn the skates, we can't even remember if we ever bought any). We FINALLY got the whole family out the door and Conner wanted one of us on each side of him. He kept saying "this is trickier than I thought it would be". So we made it to the neighbors' house (by this time Conner was already on the grass) when we decided to get his bike instead.

So David ran back to the house with the skates and got his bike. He knows how to ride his bike with training wheels. He rode it great last summer. He has ridden it great this year. But he has these special pedals attached to the pedals of bike that we use to secure his feet so he doesn't have to worry about his feet, he just worries about pushing with his legs. And the pedals have come off the bike. They've been off for a while, but every time he gets back on the bike, he melts down over the pedals. As he struggled to ride his bike and was getting so upset, my eyes were welling up with tears. We try to stay strong, to not show emotions, to just keep encouraging him, but sometimes it's so hard. It's hard to watch him try so hard to do something that is so easy for other kids, something that even last week he seemed to know how to do. It's like every time he gets on the bike, holds a pencil/crayon, eats with a fork, etc. etc. etc. he has to relearn the skill.

I mean, we are so lucky that we are working on riding a bike with Conner. He walks and talks and does so many things. But as a parent, you want your child to be just like everyone else. Today just happened to be a hard reminder.

I think I was super sensitive because I saw a mom of a kid that's in Conner's class. To be fair, I'm not 100% sure which of the girls in the class is her daughter, but I know she's in his class. Anyway, she was shopping for birthday party favors. And Conner wasn't invited to her birthday party. He hasn't been invited to a lot of the kids parties this year. I don't know why I care. It's saved us a ton of money this year. But I care and it makes me sad. I want Conner to have friends and for everyone to love him as much as we do. I guess I'm just feeling down today.

Conner - May 29, 2012

Conner is changing so much these days. While he is still a carefree and fun little guy, he is asking a lot more questions and talking about "when he was a baby". At night, all of a sudden, he wants us to read the books we read to him when he was a baby and in the hospital. I don't know how he knows which books those are, but he found Runaway Bunny (a board book) that we read when he was brand new and he wants us to read it to him. He told David that when he was a baby, he was "this big" (showing him the palm of his hand). He also asked me about heaven. I honestly have no idea what to tell him. I'm not good at that kind of stuff. It makes me teary. But Conner's happy go lucky attitude (most of the time) makes me smile at the same time. This all seems like such a mature subject for him, considering how often he is talking about Disney World and stinky girls but I guess he is ready to talk about more serious stuff sometimes too.

We have had a rough few months with Conner's health. He's actually handled it all just fine. No hospitalizations this winter and only had to use albuterol for a few weeks on and off. After RSV in December though, it has been one thing after another, including the stomach flu, sinus infections, hand foot and mouth and strep throat three times in the last two months. Not sure it's actually ever going away completely. Anyway, the ENT said the next time he gets strep, he wants to talk about getting his tonsils out so last week when he had another fever and red throat, we went to see him again and he thinks it's time. I only wish we had done everything last year when we took out his adenoids. So on June 12, Conner will have his tonsils out. The doctor will also check for any regrowth of adenoid tissue (or something like that!) and remove that. He is also going to remove his tubes that have been dislodged for a few months. The good news is that even though Conner has been sick and the tubes have been out of place, he still hasn't had an ear infection so we might finally be done with those! These last few months have really taken a lot out of Conner. He hasn't had as much energy and has been really had some rough days. I'm really praying that this procedure helps him. We are also hoping that maybe he will start to sleep a little better after the tonsillectomy. Fingers crossed.

Conner is having a great time at school. Although he doesn't know the kids as well as at his old school, he has had a lot of fun with them. He will be with a few of them next year when he goes to kindergarten there. The great thing is that the class is very small and that Conner will get a lot of attention (which he really needs). And we are pretty sure that he will keep his same "advocate" (aka shadow, para-pro, etc.) over the summer and next year. She has been absolutely fantastic with Conner. Since he doesn't need as much help with social or behavioral stuff, she works with him on academics which I love. I feel so fortunate that we have such a wonderful person looking out for Conner. As much as I tell her, I don't think she can truly know how much she has helped him this year. It has been an adjustment for us, for sure, but Conner has been happy and that is the most important thing. It's so hard to believe that the school year will be over in just a few days. Then two weeks off before camp starts. Hopefully Conner will be recovered in time for the first day. 

I want to add a few photos, but there is a huge glare where I am and I can't see the screen well, so I will get some up soon. I had some more stuff I've been thinking about lately, but I'm just happy to get something posted on this blog!!